Tag: Writing

Posted in Blog, Mental Health, Personal, Reflections, Writing

Inkrement #16 – Simply the Best

Posted on by T.L. Minor

The recent news of the passing of the legendary Rock & Roll icon, Tina Turner, at the age of 83 has deeply impacted music lovers across the world. As someone who has been influenced by her incredible talent and resilience throughout my life, I felt compelled to reflect on her remarkable journey. From the haunting melody of “What’s Love Got To Do With It?” that played in the background of my childhood to the powerful anthem “I Don’t Wanna Fight” that still resonates with me today, Tina Turner’s music has always been a constant presence.

Tina Turner was more than just an iconic singer and performer; she was a force to be reckoned with. Her ability to turn personal pain into something transcendent showcased her resilience and indomitable spirit. Despite enduring unspeakable challenges throughout her life, she refused to let her pain define her. Instead, she harnessed her anguish as a catalyst for personal transformation, inspiring millions around the world.

Tina Turner’s early memories of picking cotton as a child, coupled with feelings of abandonment and being unloved by her parents, painted a difficult picture of her formative years. Surviving a volatile and abusive relationship added to her burdens. Yet, throughout it all, Tina Turner’s resilience and determination to overcome prevailed. Her journey from these painful beginnings to becoming a middle-aged black woman who made her mark as the Queen of Rock & Roll is a testament to the human spirit’s capacity to rise above adversity.

One of the most inspiring aspects of Tina’s story for me is the love and fulfillment she found later in life. After facing numerous challenges and triumphing over personal struggles, she discovered peace and genuine love with someone who adored her unconditionally. This profound love story brought immeasurable joy and contentment to her life, proving that true greatness and contentment can be achieved at any stage. Tina Turner’s experience challenges the belief that success and happiness must be attained within certain age limits or predetermined timelines. Her story encourages us to embrace the unexpected turns and twists that life presents. It’s okay if we haven’t achieved our dreams or found our purpose by a certain age. The path to self-discovery and fulfillment can be nonlinear, and each stage of life offers unique opportunities for growth and transformation. Tina’s life exemplifies the importance of perseverance, resilience, and remaining open to new possibilities.

Tina’s ability to turn her pain into something magical and beautiful continues to inspire many, including myself. It’s with this inspiration in mind that I started this blog. In time, I want to be able to provide solace, tools, and hope to those facing trauma. Tina’s legacy serves as a reminder of the need for diverse voices and stories of triumph over hardship. Together, we can build a resilient community founded on mutual support, where people can find strength and renewed hope as they navigate their own transformative journeys.

The world has lost an icon in Tina Turner, but her legacy will forever resonate through her music, her story, and the transformative power of her journey. As we remember her, let us carry her spirit of resilience, transformation, and unwavering pursuit of happiness with us. By embracing our own pain and using it as a catalyst for personal growth, we too can turn our lives into something magical and beautiful.

Rest in Power, Queen ❤

Posted in Blog, Creative Writing, Mental Health, Reflections, Writing, Writing Prompts

Inkrement #15 – Unplugging for Mental Wellness: My Digital Detox Journey to Self-Compassion

Posted on by T.L. Minor

Writing prompt: Describe a self-care ritual that helps you combat self-criticism and fosters self-compassion. Write a step-by-step guide on how to engage in this ritual, highlighting its benefits for emotional well-being.
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Today, I want to share a self-care ritual that helps me out when I feel my inner-critic starting to get the best of me. Picture this: a break from Instagram, Twitter, TikTok, and all other social media. An opportunity to rediscover yourself, and an opportunity to prioritize your mental well-being. For this entry, I’ll let you know the steps of my own digital detox journey, sharing the tips and lessons I learned along the way.

Step 1: Understand the Benefits of a Digital Detox

First things first, let’s clarify what a digital detox is all about. It’s a conscious decision to disconnect from the digital realm, particularly social media platforms, for a specified period. It’s a chance to step away from the constant comparison, pressure, and noise of the online world. But why is it needed for our mental health? Constant exposure to social media can trigger self-criticism, feelings of inadequacy, and a distorted sense of reality. Stepping away allows us to take back our time, regain a sense of balance, and care for ourselves.

Step 2: Acknowledge the Need for Change

For me, the journey started with admitting the toll social media was taking on my mental health. I noticed the inner-critic growing louder, comparing my life to picture-perfect posts of my friends, wondering where I went wrong in my life, and questioning my own worth. It was time for change—a time to prioritize my well-being, to listen to my intuition, and to find a healthier way to engage with the digital world.

Step 3: Set Clear Intentions

Before hastily deactivating all your accounts, take a moment to set clear intentions. Reflect on what you hope to gain from this experience. Is it a desire to cultivate self-compassion, regain a lease on life, or reconnect with your hobbies? Set your goals and keep them in mind as you get started.

Step 4: Decide Your Detox Timeframe

Figure out how long you want to step away from social media. It could be a few days, a week, or even longer. Trust your instincts and choose a timeframe that feels right for you. Keep in mind that this is your path, and there is no need to follow strict guidelines. Give yourself the liberty to experiment and figure out what works best for you.

Step 5: Communicate Your Detox

Let your loved ones and close friends know about your digital detox plans. Communicate your intentions, explain the purpose behind it, and ask for their support. Letting them know will reduce any feelings of guilt or FOMO (fear of missing out) and immerse yourself without distractions.

Step 6: Prepare for Temptations

Prepare yourself for potential temptations during your digital detox. Delete social media apps from your phone or mute notifications. Create a physical barrier between yourself and your devices, like keeping them in a different room or using a designated drawer. Creating boundaries will help you resist mindlessly scrolling and keep your detox on track.

Step 7: Explore Life Outside of the Screen

Step away from the screen and enjoy real-world experiences.. Reconnect with hobbies that ignite your passion and joy. Rediscover activities you’ve neglected or explore new ones that pique your interest. Dive into books, create art, practice mindfulness, engage in nature, cook new recipes, or go on a physical adventure. The options are endless! Allow yourself to be fully present in these real life moments. Enjoy connecting with yourself and the world.

Step 8: Practice Mindful Awareness

During your digital detox, take time to practice mindfulness. Tune into your thoughts and emotions, observing them without judgment. Notice the moments when self-criticism arises and shift your focus to self-compassion. Try different techniques like deep breathing exercises, meditation, or journaling to nurture that feeling of serenity and contemplation.

Step 9: Cultivate Self-Compassion

As you detach from the digital world, take this opportunity to practice being kinder to yourself. Embrace the imperfections and celebrate your unique journey. Challenge your inner-critic with kind and encouraging pep-talks. Remind yourself that your worth extends far beyond the curated world of social media. Embrace self-acceptance, celebrate your accomplishments (big and small), and foster a loving relationship with yourself.

Step 10: Reflect and Integrate

When your digital detox comes to an end, take time to reflect on the experience. Journal about the insights, emotions, and any transformations you’ve encountered along the way. Celebrate your growth and self-love. Acknowledge the lessons learned and consider how you can integrate the positive aspects of your detox into your everyday life moving forward.

By consciously unplugging from the digital world, you can take a significant step toward combating self-criticism and nurturing self-compassion. Through this particular self-care ritual, I learned the importance of signing off to reconnect with myself, finding joy in offline hobbies, and being present in the moment. This is something I try to do at least one weekend a month. Setting boundaries, taking care of ourselves and staying mindful can truly make a difference in one’s mental well-being and to foster self-compassion.
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I chose this prompt for several reasons. My therapist has been drilling in my head that I need to practice more self-care and give myself more grace when it comes to life events. This prompt encouraged me to ritualize a way to take care of myself and my overthinking tendencies. Writing out all the steps encouraged my self-awareness and mindfulness. Explaining the “how” and “why” of taking social media breaks helped me comprehend their long-term benefits. I also hope that this gives someone an idea for how they can handle things when the self doubts and criticism start becoming too much.

Posted in Blog, Creative Writing, Personal

Inkrement #14

Posted on by T.L. Minor

Dealing with the Emotional Aftermath of Betrayal

I never thought I would find myself in this situation. The shock of discovering that someone I deeply trusted and cared about wasn’t the person I thought they were has left me reeling. The pain and confusion I’m experiencing are indescribable. The feelings of hurt, betrayal, and rage are all-consuming, and I know that I have a long road ahead of me to heal and move forward. One of these days, I’ll tell the full story. But for now, I want to talk about how I’m dealing with the emotional aftermath.

The moment I uncovered the truth, a whirlwind of emotions consumed me. Anger. Heartbreak. Disbelief. Initially, I questioned my own judgment and blamed myself for not seeing the signs. It’s crucial to acknowledge and validate these emotions. As much as it sucks and no matter how much I want to bury them, I am giving myself permission to cry, scream, and feel the full weight of what I’m going through. It’s all part of the healing process. My therapist keeps reminding me to give myself grace and that it is okay to express these very valid feelings. Trying to deny and ignore them will only make me feel shittier and prolong my healing journey.

Creating a healing and supportive environment has for myself has also been vital for my journey. I’ve found solace in a quiet corner of my home, surrounded by things that bring me comfort. Lo-fi music playing in the background and the smell of lavender from my diffusers have helped create a soothing atmosphere. Taking deep breaths and practicing mindfulness have also allowed me to find moments of peace among the chaos.

Creative writing became my refuge—an avenue for expressing the inexpressible and exploring the depths of my emotions. Here are a couple of writing prompts that helped me navigate my healing journey:

  1. Creating a fictional story or poem that symbolizes the process of letting go and finding inner peace. Metaphor and imagery have allowed me to delve deeper into my emotions and explore the healing journey in a profound way.
  2. Describing a metaphorical journey where I release the weight of betrayal and rediscover my own strength. Through this exercise, I visualize myself moving forward, growing, and finding empowerment.

As I revisited my writings, I started to notice a pattern. Themes of resilience, personal growth, and a spirit that refuses to give into despair. It became clear that despite the pain, I had the power to define my own narrative and reclaim my sense of self. Writing provided a space for reflection and self-exploration, allowing me to make sense of the chaos and find glimmers of hope.

As I navigate this healing journey, I realized several strategies that have empowered me:

  1. Practicing self-care and self-compassion: I’m learning to be gentle with myself, honoring my needs, and prioritizing self-care. This includes making time for activities that bring me joy, seeking support from loved ones, and being patient with my healing process.
  2. Setting boundaries: Establishing healthy boundaries has been crucial for protecting my emotional well-being. This means eliminating contact with the person who betrayed me and creating space for my own healing.
  3. Seeking support: I’ve realized the importance of seeking support from trusted friends and professionals. Sharing my pain and experiences with empathetic listeners has provided validation and a sense of solidarity.
  4. Embracing personal growth: This experience has become an opportunity for personal growth. I’m reflecting on the lessons learned and using them to cultivate greater resilience, self-awareness, and compassion for myself and others.

Despite the shock of the betrayal, it is not the end of my story. With writing as my outlet, some thoughtful introspection, and self-care, I’m gradually regaining my power and accepting the healing process as part of my journey forward. There are going to be highs and lows. Good days and bad days. But I’m determined to find happiness and fulfillment. My progress on the road to healing continues.

Posted in Blog, Journaling, Personal, Reflections, Writing Prompts

Inkrement #10

Posted on by T.L. Minor

Journal Prompt of the Day:
Imagine a future where you have fully healed from your trauma. What does that look like?

Imagine a future where you have fully healed from your trauma. What does that look like? For me, it’s a bright and hopeful vision that I’ve held onto for years, even when I thought healing was impossible.

Growing up with an emotionally, verbally, and sometimes physically abusive mother, I didn’t know what a healthy relationship looked like. It wasn’t until I left home, experienced shitty situationships and found myself in bad predicaments that I realized how deeply my trauma had affected me. Even then, I knew it would be a long and difficult journey to healing.

But in this future that I imagine, I am finally free. I am free from the crippling anxiety that has plagued me for years, free from the fear that has held me back in relationships and work, and free from the emotional scars that have haunted me since childhood.

In this future, I wake up feeling rested and energized. The regrets, the should’ves, the could’ves, and the would’ves no longer keep me up at all hours of the night. I no longer carry the weight of the past on my shoulders, and I am able to approach each day with a renewed sense of hope and purpose. My relationships with family and friends are strong and meaningful, and I am able to trust and love freely. I’m not afraid to express my needs and wants, and I know that my friends will listen without judgment. I’m also in a loving, supportive, and healthy romantic relationship. I know that I’m worthy of love and respect, and I no longer settle for less than I deserve.

I am also thriving in my career. I have a job that is fulfilling and challenging, and I am able to use my experiences to help others who may be going through similar struggles. I no longer wake up dreading to clock in and counting the hours until I clock out. My creativity is flowing freely, and I am able to express myself fully through my work and my hobbies.

But I think most importantly, I am at peace with myself. I no longer feel like a victim of my past, but instead, I see my trauma as a source of strength. It has given me the resilience and determination to overcome obstacles and to pursue my dreams. I am proud of who I am and what I have achieved, and I am excited about the future.

Of course, healing is not an overnight process, and setbacks will happen. But in this future that I imagine, I am equipped with the tools and the support to navigate those challenges and triggers. I have a strong sense of self-awareness, and I am able to recognize and address any negative patterns or behaviors that may arise. I’ve also learned how to express my emotions in a healthy way, and I don’t feel like I’m bottling everything up inside.

I know that this future is not guaranteed, but I also know that it is possible. With continued work and dedication to my healing journey, I believe that I can reach this place of peace and joy. In my fully healed future, I’m not defined by my trauma. It’s a part of my story, but it’s not all of it. I’m able to look back on my experiences with a sense of gratitude and understanding. I know that my experiences has shaped me into the person I am today, and I’m proud of who I am.

As I write about my fully healed future, I’m filled with a sense of hope and optimism. I know that my healing journey won’t be easy, but I also know that it’s possible. I’m committed to doing the work and taking care of myself so that I can create the future that I’ve imagined. I know that I deserve to live a life that’s free from the weight of my past hurts, and I’m excited to see what the future holds.

Take some time to envision your healed future. Put pen to paper, blog your thoughts, or make a vision board – whichever works best for you – and imagine what a recovered version of yourself will look like on your journey.

Posted in Blog, Reflections, Writing

Inkrement #9

Posted on by T.L. Minor

Stories and novels have fascinated me for as long as I can remember. As a child, I immersed myself in books, imagining myself in far-off places and fantastic adventures. As an adult, I came to realize that storytelling goes beyond entertainment and can be a powerful resource for healing. In this post, I will explore the power of sharing personal narratives and how it gives us a chance to heal.

Everyone has a story. But we often hesitate to share them due to fear of judgment and shame. I know that’s typically been the case for me. But by sharing our stories, we can gain a better understanding of ourselves and others. It allows us to process our experiences, make sense of our emotions, and find meaning in the events that have shaped us.

We can share our narratives in various ways, like writing them down in a journal or sharing them with friends. We can even perform them in front of an audience. Each approach has its benefits, but they all share a common goal: to help us find healing through the act of storytelling.

One of the most powerful ways to share our narratives is through writing, my preferred method. Writing provides a safe and private space to explore our thoughts and feelings. We can reflect and select the words that best tell our stories. But we have to admit that writing can sometimes be daunting. We may struggle to find the right words or feel overwhelmed by the emotions that arise. This is when journaling can be useful.

Journaling focuses more on free expression than structure. We write whatever comes to mind, with no worries about grammar and punctuation. This way, we can access the intense emotions that exist beneath our experiences without stressing over making it perfect.

Another way to share our stories is through spoken word and performances. Making our experiences known to the public can be empowering. Sharing our stories in front of others can be a transformative experience. It allows us to take ownership of our experiences and to reclaim our power in the face of adversity. Despite society telling you to keep your pain to yourself, this can show that you have nothing to be ashamed of. There could be people in the audience that also relate to what you’ve been through and know that they’re not alone.

The power of sharing our personal narratives lies in the act of connection. By making our stories known, we create a space for empathy, compassion, and understanding. Knowing others share our struggles can help us accept our trauma and find the courage to heal. People have used pain to create art and transformed challenges into victories. I know that’s what I’m trying to do wit the novel I want to eventually publish.

For anyone struggling with difficult emotions or feeling stuck in your healing journey, consider the power of telling your story. Whether you choose to write it, speak it, or perform it…know that your words have the power to heal, connect, and inspire. Your story matters and your voice deserves to be heard.