Tag: self-care

Posted in Blog, Reflections, Writing Prompts

Inkrement #19 – Reflections on Acts of Self-Care

Posted on by T.L. Minor

Writing Prompt: Write a reflection on acts of self-care and self-compassion that contribute to your self-worth. Explore how engaging in these acts enhances your capacity for healthy relationships.
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It’s funny how life works sometimes. You spend so much time worrying about other people’s needs, their happiness, and their well-being, that you forget to take care of yourself. I was always taught the importance of teamwork, of sacrificing for the greater good of the team or for family. But somewhere along the way, I forgot that I am part of that team too, and I need to take care of myself in order to be the best version of me. That’s when acts of self-care and self-compassion entered my life, becoming essential ingredients that contribute to my self-worth.

For the longest time, I thought that self-care was just about bubble baths, wine and swedish massages, things that seemed extravagant and indulgent. But I’ve come to realize that self-care is so much more than that. It’s about taking the time to check in with myself, to listen to my body and my mind, and to give them what they need to thrive. It’s about understanding that my needs and desires are just as important as anyone else’s.

One of the acts of self-care that has become an important part of my routine is daily meditation. It’s a fairly simple practice. Just sitting in silence, focusing on my breathing, and allowing myself to be fully present in the moment. It’s during these moments of stillness that I connect with my inner self, gaining clarity and perspective on my life. Meditation has taught me the power of self-awareness, of being in tune with my emotions and thoughts. By understanding myself better, I can go into the world with greater compassion and empathy, both towards myself and others.

One of the most transformative acts of self-care I have started practicing again is writing. Putting pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard), allowing the words to flow freely, is like embarking on a journey of self-discovery. It is a cathartic release, a sacred conversation with my own soul. Through writing, I have been learning to give a voice to my thoughts and emotions, to make sense of the chaos within. This act of self-expression allows me to acknowledge and validate my own experiences, fostering a sense of self-worth that is independent of external validation.

An important step I have taken to become more self-compassionate and foster healthier relationships is establishing boundaries. It took me a while to realize that it’s okay to say no, to prioritize my own needs and well-being. I still struggle with being a people pleaser, always putting others before myself, afraid of disappointing or letting them down. But I know that in doing so, I neglect my own boundaries and sacrificing my own happiness. Learning to set boundaries has been a transformative act of self-compassion. It’s about recognizing my limits, honoring my values, and communicating my needs assertively and respectfully. By being firm with my limits, I am true to myself in the relationships I’m in, promoting mutual respect and healthier connections.

Engaging in acts of self-care and self-compassion is not only contributing to my self-worth but has also had a major impact on my relationships. When I take care of myself, when I prioritize my own well-being, I am able to show up as a more present and wholehearted friend and family member. I have more energy, more love to give, and a greater capacity to support and uplift those around me. Now, don’t get me wrong. Of course, this isn’t a cure-all for all the challenges we face in relationships. They won’t make all of your troubles disappear or guarantee a perfect life. However, what they can offer is a strong base that you can use to strengthen and care for your relationships.

These acts not only enhance my capacity for healthy relationships but also allow me to navigate life with a greater sense of purpose and fulfillment. As I continue to cultivate self-care and self-compassion, I am reminded that taking care of myself is not a selfish act but a necessary one. It is the foundation upon which I build my relationships, my dreams, and my life. As I reflect on my own journey, I realize that I’m still a work in progress. There are days when I falter, when I forget to put myself first or when I neglect my own boundaries. But I’ve come to understand that self-care is a lifelong practice, a continuous journey of self-discovery and growth. And with each step I take, I become more attuned to my own needs and more capable of fostering the kind of relationships that bring joy, love, and fulfillment into my life.
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I chose this writing prompt because it really hits home for me. As someone who has struggled with self-worth and maintaining healthy relationships in the past, I’ve come to understand the importance of self-care and self-compassion. It’s something that my therapist drills into my head after every session. It’s something that I’m actively working on in my own life, and I wanted to take a moment to reflect on the impact it has had on me.

Posted in Blog, Creative Writing, Personal

Inkrement #14

Posted on by T.L. Minor

Dealing with the Emotional Aftermath of Betrayal

I never thought I would find myself in this situation. The shock of discovering that someone I deeply trusted and cared about wasn’t the person I thought they were has left me reeling. The pain and confusion I’m experiencing are indescribable. The feelings of hurt, betrayal, and rage are all-consuming, and I know that I have a long road ahead of me to heal and move forward. One of these days, I’ll tell the full story. But for now, I want to talk about how I’m dealing with the emotional aftermath.

The moment I uncovered the truth, a whirlwind of emotions consumed me. Anger. Heartbreak. Disbelief. Initially, I questioned my own judgment and blamed myself for not seeing the signs. It’s crucial to acknowledge and validate these emotions. As much as it sucks and no matter how much I want to bury them, I am giving myself permission to cry, scream, and feel the full weight of what I’m going through. It’s all part of the healing process. My therapist keeps reminding me to give myself grace and that it is okay to express these very valid feelings. Trying to deny and ignore them will only make me feel shittier and prolong my healing journey.

Creating a healing and supportive environment has for myself has also been vital for my journey. I’ve found solace in a quiet corner of my home, surrounded by things that bring me comfort. Lo-fi music playing in the background and the smell of lavender from my diffusers have helped create a soothing atmosphere. Taking deep breaths and practicing mindfulness have also allowed me to find moments of peace among the chaos.

Creative writing became my refuge—an avenue for expressing the inexpressible and exploring the depths of my emotions. Here are a couple of writing prompts that helped me navigate my healing journey:

  1. Creating a fictional story or poem that symbolizes the process of letting go and finding inner peace. Metaphor and imagery have allowed me to delve deeper into my emotions and explore the healing journey in a profound way.
  2. Describing a metaphorical journey where I release the weight of betrayal and rediscover my own strength. Through this exercise, I visualize myself moving forward, growing, and finding empowerment.

As I revisited my writings, I started to notice a pattern. Themes of resilience, personal growth, and a spirit that refuses to give into despair. It became clear that despite the pain, I had the power to define my own narrative and reclaim my sense of self. Writing provided a space for reflection and self-exploration, allowing me to make sense of the chaos and find glimmers of hope.

As I navigate this healing journey, I realized several strategies that have empowered me:

  1. Practicing self-care and self-compassion: I’m learning to be gentle with myself, honoring my needs, and prioritizing self-care. This includes making time for activities that bring me joy, seeking support from loved ones, and being patient with my healing process.
  2. Setting boundaries: Establishing healthy boundaries has been crucial for protecting my emotional well-being. This means eliminating contact with the person who betrayed me and creating space for my own healing.
  3. Seeking support: I’ve realized the importance of seeking support from trusted friends and professionals. Sharing my pain and experiences with empathetic listeners has provided validation and a sense of solidarity.
  4. Embracing personal growth: This experience has become an opportunity for personal growth. I’m reflecting on the lessons learned and using them to cultivate greater resilience, self-awareness, and compassion for myself and others.

Despite the shock of the betrayal, it is not the end of my story. With writing as my outlet, some thoughtful introspection, and self-care, I’m gradually regaining my power and accepting the healing process as part of my journey forward. There are going to be highs and lows. Good days and bad days. But I’m determined to find happiness and fulfillment. My progress on the road to healing continues.